It's been nearly 5 months since I have held my child in my arms and I'm starting to forget what it felt like.

I am slowly forgetting what it was like to hold her tiny little fingers and to hug her closely.I am starting to forget the way my daughter smelled. I am beginning to forget what it was like being a family of three. I am starting to forget the memories we tried so hard to make.

Life is miserable without her in our arms.

We have not seen any photographs of her since July and her first birthday is quickly approaching. Never in a million years did we think we would miss her birthday and now that this nightmare is becoming a reality we are having to come to terms with all the time we are losing with her. We just keep praying that she knows how much she is loved and that she knows we have not forgotten about her. However, no matter how much love we have for her right now it will never take away the fact that she has had to spend her first years in an orphanage. She is our baby who is stuck in another country without the love of her mother and father. How much sense does that make? We want her home more than anyone knows and one day we will board that plane with her in our arms forever, but for now we sit and wait in pain.

Please keep praying that our baby is safe and healthy. We miss her and cannot wait to bring her home.